The Mileage(Good), the Fuel(bad) & the Rise(ugly)

You were probably watching an IPL match when the last ball of the over got cut by an ad just to see a guy on a brand new bike talk with a fellow rider about how his 125er is better than the other’s 100 cc bike. Bummer, especially considering you just missed Marsh hit yet another six just to hear a mileage figure that could probably at best be achieved by a scrawny 45 kg rider lying flat on the fuel tank in a position hopefully more aerodynamic than Lance Armstrong with a 10 kmph wind nudging his rear end. Basically physics defying material, otherwise known as Standard Test Conditions (the fine print at the bottom of your TV screen).

Muthuramalingam too (no, the name is not changed, that’s the local Joe Average) has got a run of the mill 100 cc 4-stroke bike that he uses to travel 25 km a day (cut short from 30 thanks to the convenient usage of one ways & footpaths). He works with a monthly salary that has him craving for more zeros with which he supports his wife and one and a half kids – some wives don’t like calling canines by common names, they usually reserve those exclusivities for the husband. So he is obviously finding it pretty painful when fuel prices are increasing by around 10 percent while his bike is performing well below the advertising claims. The tactic has become so stale now, no buyer these days is expecting mileage to be anywhere as good. Standard Test Conditions have to be redefined, because for all they know I might be expecting to get 102.768 kmpl perched atop my bike with an unaerodynamic round tummy that has just been treated to Sarvana Bhavan’s finest. A slightly tall task I think. So kindly tell me I will be getting 60 kmpl in the city so that I know before buying a bike what 55 bucks can get me. Diesel up by 3 too. And if you don’t own a vehicle, you won’t feel left out because lpg is up by 50 too. I think suddenly everybody is going to become environment-conscious…